Bright Blonde Futility.

Firstly, what a fucking loser. I cannot imagine how embarrassing it must be to have old headmasters and teachers remember you as a relentless liar, even in your former years. Nor can I imagine the shame I would house if I constantly misquoted the classics despite harping on about having read them all.

Secondly, and more importantly, I started to wonder what it would be like to be a man of similar character and morality as our ex Prime Minister. I cannot foresee a reality in which I would still be with my partner – philandering and lying aside. I’m not sure how anyone would introduce him to their parents.

“Hey mum and dad, I’ve met someone. I don’t know how many kids he has and he’s cheated on every woman he’s ever been with – he’s actually with someone else at the moment but swears he loves me and he’s really sweet and kind.”

I don’t believe I’d make it through the front door but for the sake of the ink drying on this page – let’s imagine I did. How many times could I dodge a simple question? How long would it be before everyone points out I’m an idiot? If you ask for the time and I start blathering on about why shoelaces are undone – words would lose all meaning.

Beyond all the above, I maintain that good men hold morality, decency and honesty as the cornerstone of their character. To roll over and allow things to go unchecked and unquestioned is to empower and enable the most abysmal behaviour because it’s banter or some other nonsense excuse quickly conjured up to evade responsibility for the silence on your part. The high road is hard-earned and principles demand lifelong commitment, not perfection. It is a contract with yourself to be better even when it is difficult and above all it requires shame. However, Boris Johnson is not an individual who appears to experience it. To a man like this, I am nothing and no one, nor are you.

A man without shame and driven by self-interest cannot serve the public or I. Can you trust a man who cheats on his partner? I cannot. A man who has forsaken vows of loyalty and love, promises made before friends, family and all that is holy. There is no oath or honour to bind him to honesty because he is inherently untrustworthy. He held high office and we are all poorer for his tenure.

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